Can You Beat Pwiggle?
August/22/2007 12:29 PM Filed in: Random
I've been depressed lately. In all facets of my life things are looking up, but there is one area that is currently chipping away at my will to live. It seems that ever since those 3 red lights showed up on my xbox 360, life has lost its meaning. What do I do to consume my late afternoons? I am often too tired to write and too awake to nap. I can refresh my MySpace page and constantly check my facebook newsfeed, but without Madden, things are just not the same.
This past weekend I, like a broken man who was given a glimpse of what his life could be, was able to play Madden 08 for the first time. My boy Theo Robertson owns a copy for 360, and he invited me over to play.
I have said before that I would choose Madden over women in many situations. That day, Madden was my woman. What we shared was similar to a sexual experience. First, I got to know it. I read the manual, and reviewed the new controls. Then I turned it on. Self explanatory. Then there was the foreplay. I checked the rosters and the ratings. Its body (ratings system) was amazing, and it's 100 speed guy named Devon Hester made me nearly faint. Then we went at it. Oh man we must have done it 6 or 7 times in a row. The room was spinning, the temperature was rising, and my whole body was trembling with joy. Madden and I started at 10am and I didn't say my goodbyes until 5pm the next day. I started out pretty bad because I hadn't done it in months. By the time I was done, I was back to my old dominant self. I found myself taking control early, easing my way in, then pounding (my opponents) towards the end, leaving all the other guys wondering how I could do it so well.
I am now again ready to ascend to the top of the internet Madden world via Xbox Live. I go back to San Diego at the end of the month, at which time I will finally send my Xbox in for repair. I don't know how my budding Madden career will coincide with my basketball career but I think I can make it work. I guess I'm just a player.
For those who want to challenge me and my Madden abilities, my gamertag is pwiggle. I may have to re-subscribe or something when I get set up again, but yea pwiggle is it. I know what you're thinking: "What the hell does pwiggle mean?" I'll just have to tell you then..
You might have read that as pwig-gle, but that is wrong. It's actually P Wiggle, but when creating my gamertags years ago, no spaces were allowed on video game save names.
P Wiggle started years ago, my freshman year at Cal, actually. We were down in downtown L.A. for the Pac-10 tournament. I was taking a nap in my room, minding my own business, when my mom walked in. I knew she was coming, so I had propped open the door, but I had fallen asleep while waiting. My roommate at the time, Tayshan Forehan-Kelly, was wide awake, and in the bathroom. My mom, supposedly, allegedly, upon walking into the room, said "Where is my little Piggle Wiggle?".
I never heard these words myself, as I was sleeping when she came in. Also, she had never called me Piggle Wiggle ever before in my life. 3Han (Tayshan's nickname) however, supposedly, allegedy, heard my mom utter these words, and proceded to tell everyone on the team except me.
The next day at practice, everybody kept calling me Piggle Wiggle and variations such as pickle wickle, and I had no idea why. Finally Richard Midgley alerted me that 3Han overheard my mom.
Sooooo when we got back to Berkeley, we were playing Halo. It was actually a multi room, team Halo event featuring the Basketball team vs. the Baseball team 8 on 8. When making my profile, they bet me that I wouldn't use P-Wiggle as the name. The name has never changed since.
This past weekend I, like a broken man who was given a glimpse of what his life could be, was able to play Madden 08 for the first time. My boy Theo Robertson owns a copy for 360, and he invited me over to play.
I have said before that I would choose Madden over women in many situations. That day, Madden was my woman. What we shared was similar to a sexual experience. First, I got to know it. I read the manual, and reviewed the new controls. Then I turned it on. Self explanatory. Then there was the foreplay. I checked the rosters and the ratings. Its body (ratings system) was amazing, and it's 100 speed guy named Devon Hester made me nearly faint. Then we went at it. Oh man we must have done it 6 or 7 times in a row. The room was spinning, the temperature was rising, and my whole body was trembling with joy. Madden and I started at 10am and I didn't say my goodbyes until 5pm the next day. I started out pretty bad because I hadn't done it in months. By the time I was done, I was back to my old dominant self. I found myself taking control early, easing my way in, then pounding (my opponents) towards the end, leaving all the other guys wondering how I could do it so well.
I am now again ready to ascend to the top of the internet Madden world via Xbox Live. I go back to San Diego at the end of the month, at which time I will finally send my Xbox in for repair. I don't know how my budding Madden career will coincide with my basketball career but I think I can make it work. I guess I'm just a player.
For those who want to challenge me and my Madden abilities, my gamertag is pwiggle. I may have to re-subscribe or something when I get set up again, but yea pwiggle is it. I know what you're thinking: "What the hell does pwiggle mean?" I'll just have to tell you then..
You might have read that as pwig-gle, but that is wrong. It's actually P Wiggle, but when creating my gamertags years ago, no spaces were allowed on video game save names.
P Wiggle started years ago, my freshman year at Cal, actually. We were down in downtown L.A. for the Pac-10 tournament. I was taking a nap in my room, minding my own business, when my mom walked in. I knew she was coming, so I had propped open the door, but I had fallen asleep while waiting. My roommate at the time, Tayshan Forehan-Kelly, was wide awake, and in the bathroom. My mom, supposedly, allegedly, upon walking into the room, said "Where is my little Piggle Wiggle?".
I never heard these words myself, as I was sleeping when she came in. Also, she had never called me Piggle Wiggle ever before in my life. 3Han (Tayshan's nickname) however, supposedly, allegedy, heard my mom utter these words, and proceded to tell everyone on the team except me.
The next day at practice, everybody kept calling me Piggle Wiggle and variations such as pickle wickle, and I had no idea why. Finally Richard Midgley alerted me that 3Han overheard my mom.
Sooooo when we got back to Berkeley, we were playing Halo. It was actually a multi room, team Halo event featuring the Basketball team vs. the Baseball team 8 on 8. When making my profile, they bet me that I wouldn't use P-Wiggle as the name. The name has never changed since.
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